funny « Andrea Zuill’s Blog

Posts Tagged ‘funny’

Another kind of dog.

Wednesday, March 27th, 2013

(Please click on the images if you have trouble reading the dialog.)

There have been quite a few children’s books about dogs. Lovable, people loving dogs. I’m writing a book about my dog, but he’s a bit different. My boy needs personal space. Strangers are to be seen from a distance and they’re definitely NOT supposed to come up and manhandle his butt. Even if they do it while saying “Who’s a good boy then?”

I can’t really blame him. If someone came up and manhandled my butt and said, “Who’s a good girl then?” I would be VERY upset and prone to physical violence.

Sometimes I wonder if he ‘s seen one to many Public Service Announcements about strangers.

And let’s face it, there is nothing stranger than some children.

When I say children that includes babies. As I’ve said before, in my Christmas story ( http://zuill.us/andreablog/2012/12/06/a-christmas-dog/ ), my dog can’t stand babies but he does like their toys. He’d never hurt a child but stealing from them is not a moral issue for him.

There is a type of child my dog likes. My furry guy likes to be treated like just another kid.

He may not know what is going on but he gives it his all.

There is only one problem with gaining my dogs trust. . .

Tags: andrea zuill, ants, babies, baby, badbird, boy, cartoon, children, dog, dog story, etsy, flickr, funny, play, SCBWI, society of children's book writers and illustrators, story, storybook, stranger danger, zuill
Posted in General Stuff, Musings | 4 Comments »

I got my flu shot.

Thursday, January 31st, 2013

I got my flu shot!

I don’t know if this happens to you, but when I get my flu shot I have feelings of invincibility. I feel like I can do crazy things! It’s like no matter what happens at least I won’t catch the flu. Or, at least, there is only a 3% chance of getting the flu. And those are my kind of odds.

But still, I hold back, I’m no fool.

This time, after I got my shot, I went on the web and read up on what the flu shot was all about. That’s when I was horrified to learn that it takes two weeks to get the full effect from the inoculation. I was still fair game for the flu bug.

Well, that sure put a damper on my euphoria.

So, I’ll soldier on with my tradition flu vigil.

But in two weeks, watch out! I’ll be 3% more dangerous than I am now.

Tags: alligator, andrea zuill, Art, badbird, cartoon, dog, etsy, fight, flu shot, funny, illustration, pen and ink, SCBWI, silly, society of children's book writers and illustrators, story, zuill
Posted in Musings | 3 Comments »

Nothing should hold you back. Drawing with flaws.

Monday, January 28th, 2013

Many future artist/illustrators hold themselves back by feeling that there is some great deficit in their skills. If you have ever said, “I can never be an artist because I can’t even draw a straight line”, please get someone to kick your butt for me. Who cares about straight lines? I sure don’t! You can’t draw perspective? So what! Wacky perspective is fun! The most important thing is to relax and be your old weird drawing self.

Here are some of my “weaknesses”.

First, I can’t draw a whole scene. I have to put it together in pieces.

Second, I can’t draw figures facing to the right. They always have to face to the left. No problem. I just scan it into Illustrator and make a mirror image. I can actually think of a dozen ways to correct this problem without using the computer.

Third, my perspective is pretty weak. So, I just get it close enough, and people think it’s charming.

So there, no more excuses. Just draw.

And, by the way, the illustration above was made using pieces of the sketch below. This is my extra special art secret, so don’t tell anybody.

Tags: andrea zuill, Art, badbird, beware of dog, cartoon, dog, etsy, funny, illustration, learning, lesson, print, SCBWI, silly, Society of Children's book writers and Illustratros, tutorial, wolf, zuill
Posted in Art, General Stuff, Making Art, Tutorials | 3 Comments »

Born to snark.

Friday, August 31st, 2012

Some of you might wonder what I do in real life. Well, currently I am putting my natural born snark abilities to work. I was contacted by two cutely evil fellow snarkist. Their dream was starting a greeting card line for people that find that making rude comments actually make them feel better when the world has gone all wonky. They needed someone to design two little girls to express their crankiness. And, for some reason, they hired me as their artist.

You know, you go for years with people telling you that your jokes are too rude, too acerbic, too snarky. So you question yourself and the life you’ve been living. But, one day, Lori and Kym (Snark Haus founders) contact you and tell you that everything is going to be okay. They support your snarkiness and tell you to get working on creating some very naughty little girls. Everything you felt about the world has now been validated.

So, for all those cutsey pie people out there that thought I was too much for their taste, boogers to you! That’s right, BOOGERS!

Check out Snark Hause at: http://www.snarkhaus.com/

And, if you feel like being part of this project check out Snark Haus’s Kickstart page:http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/248671527/snark-haus-greetings-for-the-wicked-truth/posts

Tags: Art, badbird, cartoon, evil, evil little girls, funny, girls, greeting cards, illustration, kym vross DeGenaro, Lori Putnam, silly, snark haus, zuill
Posted in Art, General Stuff, Musings | 2 Comments »

English Bulldog

Monday, August 13th, 2012

I felt like doing some dog art. The image above is of an English Bulldog, obviously. They really crack me up.

I think I’ll do a Dachshund next.

Tags: Art, badbird, bulldog, bully, bully breed, cartoon, dog, dog portrait, drawing, english bulldog, funny, giclee, illustration, ink, portrait, print, zuill
Posted in Art, Art Prints, General Stuff | 6 Comments »

My Camping Trip

Monday, July 9th, 2012

I have convinced my dog to tell you about our latest camping trip. Since most people don’t speak Corgidor I have translated his words for you.

We went camping again, but I am a much changed dog from the one that was scared at every noise on our first trip (http://zuill.us/andreablog/2011/05/13/three-things-that-freak-out-my-dog/). I still hate how long it takes to get to our camp site, but Mom tries to make the long car ride fun by pointing out things along the road that I might find interesting.

______

I made quick business of securing our camp site.

_______

Since wolves don’t eat Miss Daisy’s Nutritional Kibble for the Precocious Senior Pooch in the wild I refused it too. But Mom, being very smart, brought a jar of caribou scrapings and mixed it in with my food. This was a good compromise.

______

We hiked a lot! One thing I like about being in the wild is you can pee on anything and nobody gets mad!

________

As much as I liked being way up in the mountains, it was also fun to go into town and check out the local action. I met a couple ladies that were just my type.